This Dying World (Book 2): Abandon All Hope Page 18

  “Rattlesnake!” Murphy laughed, dangling the dead animal on the tip of his knife blade. “Bet you’re happy we killed it!”

  “My ass cheeks thank you!”

  “Well, I’m not a great cook, but at least it’s protein,” Murphy said as he set to work skinning the large snake.

  “I’ve survived on MREs and cans of tuna for weeks,” Jason replied. “A little warm meat sounds like heaven.”

  “I’d imagine,” Murphy said as he gutted the snake. He tossed its entrails over to Titan, who happily devoured the raw organs. “How you holding up, Gunny?”

  “Call me Jason. I don’t feel much like a Gunny right now.”

  “I get it,” Murphy replied. “Shit went sideways. They were good men, but the whole world is punching its own ticket. We honor their memory by pushing on and doing whatever good we can with the time we have left.”

  “I keep thinking about Jeffries’ family,” Jason said. “I wonder if they made it. If they did, how long will they wait for a man who will never make it home?”

  “Even if they knew what happened, they’d probably never stop waiting,” Murphy exhaled, staring into the flames. The orange light danced across his face, exposing the emotion he was trying so desperately to hide. “I haven’t.”

  “Are you sure?” Jason asked. “About your family I mean.”

  “I got confirmation about ten minutes after their transport went down,” Murphy said as he drove the skewer into the meat. He set it on the rocks and over the campfire, the flames licking up toward the pink flesh. The sweet smell of sizzling meat sent Jason’s stomach into uncontrollable growls.

  “I’m sorry Murph,” Jason said. “You’re handling it remarkably well. I think I would be in shambles if I were in the same boat.”

  “I was. Still am.” Murphy looked up from the fire. “I was on the front line when the fences were breached. There were literally thousands of those things marching right over us. We would start to get overrun, and then fall back. We’d set up another line until we were overrun again. That dance kept going all night.”

  “You know, at first I didn’t think it was going to be much of a fight,” Jason replied. “I mean, they were unarmed and uncoordinated. They were so slow, we should have been able to just pick them off like target practice. Looking back, it was a shit storm from the start.”

  “You’re not kidding,” Murphy said, turning the skewer around. The meat sizzled over the flames, grease dancing over the blackened flesh. “We were a few hours into the shit when evacuations started. But by that time, our own people started to turn. My family was on the first round of choppers heading out. It sounded like the pilot turned mid-flight and attacked the co-pilot. They went down with everyone on board.”

  “I…I don’t know–”

  “Stop,” Murphy interrupted. “There’s nothing that can be said. After I heard what happened, I walked away. I am ashamed of it, but I walked away from it all. I saw the writing on the wall. There was no winning against what we were fighting. I went back to that house and waited to die. I put my sidearm to my head more times than I care to remember.”

  “What stopped you?” Jason asked, instantly regretting the question as the words rolled off his tongue.

  “You guys, actually.” Murphy took the skewer from the flames. He took his knife, cutting the meat and skewer into two equal halves. He handed one to Jason while biting into his own.

  Jason bit down hungrily into the burnt flesh, savoring the warm meat as it damn near melted in his mouth. He swallowed, and dove into another bite before the first piece hit his stomach. He hadn’t realized how truly hungry he was, and he was ready to devour the whole meal without coming up for air.

  “Good stuff?” Murphy asked. He smiled, but Jason could see the grin was simply painted on.

  “You know,” Jason started through smacking lips. “I was always told snake tasted like chicken. Well, snake tastes like snake. Right now, it’s the best damn barbeque I can remember!”

  “Copy that!” This time, Murphy’s smile was genuine. “Anyway, you guys came flying into the neighborhood like you owned the place. I was waiting for every undead piece of shit to follow you in. When that didn’t happen, I started watching. When I wasn’t drowning my sorrows in Jim Beam, I had my ear to what was going on outside.”

  “I guess I’m glad we could help you get over things,” Jason said.

  “I’m not over anything!” Murphy snapped, his eyes immediately falling to the ground as he sighed. His shoulders slumped, moistened eyes catching the flickering flames in the rapidly cooling evening. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to snap. I’ll never be over it. At best, I’ve been distracting myself. But every time I close my eyes, it’s only to nightmares of what they must have gone through.”

  “I’m sorry, Murph. I really am. That was a stupid thing for me to say. I wish we could have done more. I would have loved to meet them.”

  “There’s nothing more we could have done,” Murphy replied. “The odds were against us from the beginning. Who knows, maybe they’re better off.”

  “How so?” Jason questioned.

  “At least they won’t have to live through this.” Murphy waved his hand toward the darkening horizon. “They won’t have to live in day to day fear.”

  “Murph,” Jason started as he swallowed his last bite of snake. “There’s nothing on God’s green Earth I can say that can take away the pain of what you lost. If there was, I’d say it a thousand times over. But for what’s it’s worth, I’m glad you showed up. And I’m happy you’re here.”

  “I am too. And I genuinely hope we find your family. Maybe if I can help with that, I can feel like I got back some of what I lost.”

  “I don’t know,” Jason smiled. “When you meet Dan, you might regret coming along for this joy ride.”

  “He can’t be that bad,” Murphy replied as he scanned the horizon. He looked toward the van parked twenty feet away, cocking his head to the side to see around the vehicle. “I mean, you guys are brothers, and there is that saying about an apple not falling far from a tree and all.”

  “Yeah,” Jason exhaled as he leaned back against the rock with the first full stomach he’d had in weeks. “I think that apple hit Dan square in the head when it fell. Think of him as the older, crazier, and far less disciplined version of me.”

  “So,” Murphy started, turning a sly eye to Jason. “You’re saying he’s you without the stick up his ass?”

  “Well that wasn’t nice,” Jason chuckled. “I’m more disciplined. He’s more of a three ring circus.”

  “Oh, I see,” Murphy chided. “He’s more fun. Got it.”

  “I can drop you off at the next bus stop if you want,” Jason said sarcastically.

  “I only fly first class my friend,” Murphy replied. “So unless you got a golden ticket and a Boeing aircraft in your back pocket, you’re stuck with me.”

  “No tickets,” Jason grinned. “I do have a 747 in my pants, but it’s not in my back pocket!”

  Murphy held his gut as he roared in laughter. Jason joined in, laughing until tears rolled from his eyes. Murphy’s face reddened in the light of the campfire as he drew breath. As his laughter died, his smile began to vanish. The corners of his lips turned down, his face darkening.

  “Thanks for that,” he said. “I suddenly felt guilty for laughing after all that’s happened. When I laugh, I think of my wife, and how she used to–” Murphy stood, turning away from Jason. His head dropped, shoulders slumping once more.

  “Murph–”

  “I know,” Murphy interrupted. “If you don’t mind, I’ll take first watch. I kind of want to be alone with my thoughts.”

  “Sure thing, buddy. If you need to vent, wake me up.”

  “Will do,” Murphy said, turning towards Jason. He raised a finger, pointing directly at Jason. “Titan! Guard!” he commanded.

  Titan rose up, walking over and laying down at Jason’s side. He set his head on Jason’s lap, happily accepti
ng a scratch on the top of his head. Breathing deeply, he closed his eyes, ears twitching at every sound.

  “He makes a good blanket too,” Murphy said as he picked up his rifle. “But he drools.”

  “Awesome,” Jason sighed as he closed his eyes. Absentmindedly, he ran his fingers across his own holstered sidearm, comforted by the feel of the cold weapon on his side.

  He opened one eye, watching Murphy drop a few more logs into the fire before trudging off to the van. Murphy opened the driver’s door, switching on the radio and leaning back in his seat. Music quietly filled the night air as the Stevie Ray Vaughn CD began to belt out his unique style of blues.

  Jason closed his eyes again, wrapping his arms around his chest for warmth. The smell of the crackling campfire lulled him toward sleep, as his full stomach helped to relax his body and mind.

  With a final scratch for Titan, Jason slipped off to sleep, and the nonstop horror movie that his unconscious mind played all night with no hope for intermission until he woke again.

  **********

  Murphy scanned the area, watching for the monsters that now lurked beyond the dark veil of nightfall. Seeing no immediate danger, and noting that Titan wasn’t losing his shit, Murphy sunk into the van’s unusually comfortable captain’s chair. He popped the CD he’d eyed all day into the player, and filled the cabin with the sweet licks from Stevie Ray’s guitar.

  He knew it wasn’t the smartest idea in the deathly quiet world to make more noise than was absolutely necessary, but he needed something from the normal world to calm his nerves and quiet his thoughts. He’d spent so long honing Titan’s skills as well, so there was nothing that would sneak up on them in the dark as long as his companion was out there.

  Murphy glanced back at Jason, the man sleeping soundly with his hand on Titan’s back. Titan’s head lay on the ground, breathing heavily with his eyes closed as if in a deep sleep. Murphy waited patiently until he saw the flickering campfire reflected in Titan’s eyes. They slowly moved from left to right toward the darkness before closing again. The dog’s ears twitched continually, twisting around like two tiny radar dishes. Though Titan appeared to be sleeping, he was on high alert.

  Good boy, Murphy thought as he drew his M1911 from its holster, setting it on the dash in front of him. Fishing out a cleaning kit from his pack in the back seat, he lay his rifle across his lap for some basic maintenance to the soothing song, Tin Pan Alley.

  There was comfort in the process of cleaning his weapon. The action of maintaining his rifle allowed him to remove himself from the big picture for a short while. This time however, he could find no such comfort. His mind would not calm, his thoughts would not silence. After ten minutes of trying, he finally gave up and reassembled his M4 carbine rifle.

  He glanced back over at his sleeping companions again. Jason was restless, his head rocking from side to side, hands and feet twitching. Murphy had seen it many times on the battlefield. The horrors of combat would invade dreams in the few and far between moments that rest could be found. Living every day and night on edge could turn men and women hard as granite on the outside, but leave them crumbled and broken within.

  Murphy drew his arms across his chest as the chill of the night time desert air invaded the cabin. He fished a simple cap from his MCCUU trouser pocket, pulling the cover over his shaved head. As he did, he felt something fall from his pocket and hit the floorboard.

  He reached down between the seats, pulling up an old cigarette tin he’d held onto for weeks. Murphy let out a deep sigh as he popped open the tin, staring with hatred at the five plastic tubes, each filled with a translucent orange fluid.

  He pulled one of the vials out, tilting it back and forth as he watched the liquid splash around inside. Regret and guilt welled up in his chest as he stared at the object in his hand.

  If we knew just a month sooner, he thought. Just one fucking month!

  His hand suddenly shot to his pistol as something cold brushed against his other hand. He spun in the seat, bringing his weapon head level to where he expected to see the undead threat. Instead, Titan looked up to him from outside the open door. His hackles raised as he stared at his master, waiting for the next command. It took a minute for Murphy to realize there was no immediate danger, and his dog was only reacting to his own fear.

  “Jesus Christ!” he exhaled, his heart thundering in his chest. “Good stalk, boy.”

  Titan sat down, wagging his tail at Murphy’s praise. He nudged Murphy’s hand with his cold wet nose, and was rewarded with a vigorous scratch.

  “The Gunny get too jumpy for you?” Murphy smiled. “He’s gone through a lot in the last few weeks. I’d imagine he ain’t ever gonna sleep right again. I don’t know if any of us will,” he exhaled, the smile fading from his lips.

  Titan lay his head on Murphy’s knee, tilting his head to the side to allow for more scratches behind his pointed ear. His nose twitched as he explored the various smells around him. His whole body suddenly jerked as his head shot up. Titan’s eyes narrowed as he locked onto the vial in Murphy’s hand.

  “I know bud,” Murphy said under his breath. “It bothers me too.” He placed the vial back into the tin, but not before producing a small wallet sized photo he’d stashed behind the other vials.

  Tears welled up as he ran his thumb across the small photo of his family, his throat constricting with intense grief. The portrait was barely a couple months old, something he’d insisted on before shipping off on his last assignment. Had he known it would be the last time he’d lay eyes on them, he would have told his superiors to piss off and walked away from his entire career.

  Titan let out a long whine as he lay his head on Murphy’s knee once more, his sharp eyes drawn to the image in his master’s hand.

  “I miss them too, bud,” Murphy whispered through his emotional firestorm. He looked off into the darkness, a sudden soul crushing loneliness enveloping him. “They promised me they would be safe,” he mumbled.

  He turned off the music, an eerie silence filling the van with a cold stillness that could not be attributed to the chill in the air. A breeze blew through the dry brush, whistling as it passed through the dead branches and withered foliage.

  “Sharon would have loved this,” he said. “I’d bet even Shae and Aidan would have stopped arguing by now. God I wish they were still here.” Tears rolled down his cheeks, falling with heavy taps onto his pants.

  Murphy reached down to stroke Titan’s fur. Instead, Titan licked Murphy’s hand, nudging it to the top of his head while leaning against the Marine’s leg.

  “I got a decision to make, bud,” Murphy said, wiping the tears from his eyes. “Do I tell Jason or not? Will it make any difference if he knew?”

  Murphy looked over at Jason again. He slept soundly, which was surprising considering the fact that not more than a few minutes prior he looked like he was fighting a horde of the things by himself.

  “If I spill everything to him, that man over there might just kill me,” he said, looking down into Titan’s dark eyes.

  “And I might let him.”

  Chapter 17

  Joe’s eyes snapped open, surprised to find himself alone under the several layers of quilts. His back ached from a night of sleeping against the cold brick wall. His joints cracked in protest as he stretched out, shaking the numbing chill from his hands.

  Katie was still curled up in Dan’s lap on the other side of the room. He slept soundly, his arms wrapped around his daughter. Joe smiled at the two of them, happy they were finally beyond whatever it was that had driven the father and daughter apart. Now, Joe doubted Katie would be able to leave her father’s lap if she wanted to.

  It’s about time, he thought.

  The rest of the kids huddled together with Anna on a single air mattress. The fire had long since expired, leaving those that had sought its warmth to rely solely on blankets and each other. It was not ideal, but no one would freeze to death before he could get the bus moving again.


  He started to unravel himself from the knot of blankets when Rosa floated in through the flap in the plastic wall. Her emerald green eyes made his heart skip when she smiled at him. Despite her disheveled hair and the layers of grime caked on her skin and clothing, she was still the most beautiful woman he’d ever met.

  “Good morning,” she whispered as she rejoined him under their heavy wrappings. “Did you miss me?”

  “You know I did,” he smiled. “Where’ve you been?”

  “I brought you something,” she said, producing two granola bars from under the blankets. “It’s not bacon and eggs, but it’s the best breakfast in bed I could come up with.”

  “You just made my morning. How’d I get so lucky?”

  “I have a thing for big men with southern accents,” she responded. “You’re kind of cute too. That helps.”

  “I wish I could have met you before all this,” he said before biting down on the chocolate chip granola bar. “My brother would have loved you.”

  Joe turned his eyes from Rosa, his heart falling as his mind’s eye turned to old images of family that he would never have the chance to speak to again.

  “Was he in Washington too?” Rosa asked, her caring tone filled with concern.

  “Yeah,” Joe sighed. “He was out visiting our parents when everything went to hell. I’d messaged him a few times before we lost our signal. That’s when we learned about the bomb.”

  “I’m so sorry Joe,” Rosa said. She took his hand in hers.

  “You know, it’s funny how things turn out. I really had no plans on sticking it out with Chris. I only came by that morning to check on him before heading out to D.C. myself. He wanted to go to the gun store in town, and I didn’t want him to go alone. Then I heard Dan was on his way to the farm with his family, and I thought I would wait them out to make sure he was okay. Then you guys showed up, and I didn’t want to leave Chris alone with strangers. When Dan was shot and that horde showed up, I knew I wasn’t going anywhere.”